posted October 26, 2012

State's Attorney Peter Florrick is looking to sweep the competition away at this weekend's Cook County Democratic Party Gubernatorial Straw Poll (more commonly known as CCDPGSP). In Cook County, Florrick has been dominating the media more than the entire Lohan clan combined for a number of years now with his history of chivalrous assistance of women on the street, deep personal interest in prison facilities, and confused interview stylings.

Florrick's challengers - the downstate Oliver Staub and State Rep. Neil Acavello - are hoping to swipe at least 10% of the vote away from the hometown host. Unless someone spikes the corn dog batter with a psychotropic, does anyone really believe these voters can be swayed? Tell us what you think, faithful readers!